I'm married!!!!

I was married to my love last weekend on Oct 1st, 2011. A lot of people at the wedding asked if I could put my vows up because they could not hear them at the wedding so enjoy....

Ruth 1:16 states, "Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God."  Before I met you, Dustin, I knew God but my relationship with Him was weak and stagnant. You have encouraged and challenged me to strengthen and grow my relationship with Christ.  From that moment, I knew you were sent for me and I knew I loved you.

"I love you" means that I accept you for the person that you are and that I do not wish to change you into someone else.  It means that I do not expect perfection from you-- just as you do not expect it from me.  It means that I will love you and stand by you even through the worst of times.  It means loving you when you are in a bad mood or too tired to do the things I want to do.  It means loving you when you're down-- not just when you're fun to be with.  "I love you" means that I know your deepest secrets and do not judge you for them-- asking in return only that you do not judge me for mine.  It means that I care enough to fight for what we have and that I love you enough to not let go.  It means thinking of you, dreaming of you, wanting and needing you constantly, and knowing that you feel the same way for me.

Dustin, I promise to be your helper while you lead our family down the path God has laid out for us.  I promise to challenge you, support you, learn from you, and encourage you every step of the way.

Dustin, I promise not only to be a good and faithful wife to you, but also a patient, loving step mother to Rylee, Jacob, and Bethany; caring for them and providing for them to the best of my ability. I promise to be their strength and their emotional support, loving each and every one of you with all my heart. Where you go, I'll go, and where you stay, I'll stay.

I stink...

... at writing more than twice a year! Haha.. I have been soooo busy. I thought once school was out for the summer, my life would slow down a little but that is soooooo not the case. In its place I have a new job, mini vacays, friends to visit, family to fit in, and Dustin and the kids. I do love my life right now though. Among all of the other craziness, I have been trying to find time for the gym. I was doing pretty well up until about 2 wks ago when I hurt my knee. Turns out I have a Baker's Cyst in the back of my knee that causes pain and swelling. Good news is no surgery; Bad news is it can reoccur.  This can't keep me down though. I really want to lose this last 30 lbs that I have been talking about for 5 yrs now.

Even now typing that makes me feel like a HUGE failure.  The good news with failure though is that it forces you to learn new things. For instance, I know that I have a problem sticking with a weight loss/gym program for longer than 3 wks.  I like team sports more than lifting weights solo (BORING!).  In my photography, it took me wishing I had more opportunity for growth to finally get my website up and going and I have business cards now. I have a feeling my photo business will be on hold for a while with everything else going on in my life but I think this is an opportunity for me to perfect my skills and establish my art and style. 

I don't know if you have noticed with just the few words I have written thus far but I am also trying a new thing... well maybe it's not a new thing for me but I am bringing back the power of positivity. I am finding at least one good thing in every situation.  I call it "Look at the bright side."  I think this is hugely important because now that I am spending so much time with Dustin and his three kids, I am very aware of the effect of my words and actions.  I like to observe them and wonder where in the world did they hear that or see that exemplified. 

Just the other night, Dustin's two youngest were outside playing with him and I was relaxing on the couch with his oldest daughter, Rylee. She got up all of a sudden and said she wanted to go outside too and went to get her shoes. When she came back down and was putting them on she said, " Meggie, you know how you said your sister is your best friend? Well, I have decided you were right that sisters should be best friends." And then she told me her and her sister started laughing together the other night for no reason at all and it was so fun :)

This got me to thinking at how much I tell them intentionally and how much they get from just observing my actions and unintentional words.  My motto has always been, Live with intention but until I had those  little eyes on me all the time did I ever think how vitally important that actually is. So now I have been trying to voice a "bright side" to every situation. It has been working to decrease my own negativity too and has been helping me to take a step back and think before I react.

I am not perfect and still fall to quick irrational reactions but I am getting better:)

I Won't Let You Go

I love this new song by Rascal Flatts...

Rascal Flatts – I Won’t Let Go Lyrics

It’s like a storm
That cuts a path
It’s breaks your will
It feels like that

You think your lost
But your not lost on your own
Your not alone
I will stand by you
I will help you through
When you’ve done all you can do
If you can’t cope
I will dry your eyes
I will fight your fight
I will hold you tight
And I wont let go

 

It hurts my heart
To see you cry
I know it’s dark
This part of life
Oh it finds us all
And we’re too small
To stop the rain
Oh but when it rains

I will stand by you
I will help you through
When you’ve done all you can do
And you can’t cope
I will dry your eyes
I will fight your fight
I will hold you tight

And I wont let you fall
Don’t be afraid to fall
I’m right here to catch you
I wont let you down
It wont get you down
Your gonna make it
Yea I know you can make it

 

Cause I will stand by you
I will help you through
When you’ve done all you can do
And you can’t cope
And I will dry your eyes
I will fight your fight
I will hold you tight
And I wont let go
Oh I’m gonna hold you
And I wont let go
Wont let you go
No I wont

Overwhelmed

Usually, the word overwhelmed has a bad connotation, but right now, this word best describes everything amazing and good that is going on in my life right now. If I were looking in at my life from someone else's point of view, I would probably think I was crazy for not feeling something other than joy.  I have so much going on that could scare me and shut me down.  I never imagined I would be this blessed all at once.

I start back to school in January for a career that I pray I will be able to master. I am afraid I will not be able to overcome passing out at the sight of a bad injury/blood. I am afraid I will waste more money and time in school and not be able to excel.  Even though I am afraid of all of these things, I am still EXCITED about going back to school to learn how to care for the sick.

In January, I will also be learning a new job. Our team will be under a new segment and this is both scary and exciting as well. This new segment offers a LOT of new potential for growth.  If things work out like I hope, I will be starting school as well as starting a new job. I hope this will mean a significant raise as well.

Saving the best for last.... I am completely, head over heels in love. I am unable to comprehend how this has happened so fast and it should scare me.  I have never felt so comfortable being myself with someone. This man loves me for me and that completely amazes me.  All of my life, I have been holding a mask for each man I have dated.  I have molded myself to be what they need. I sacrificed what I needed to make them happy and I have been hurt and have hurt myself in the process.

Dustin is completely different.

We accept each other exactly as we are. He is passionate and caring.  Best of all, he has a great love for God that I have been searching for in a man. He holds me accountable and I support him. All of my friends are probably sick of hearing about him, because I can not express enough how happy I am.  I just pray now that God will continue to show us His will for our lives and help us follow the path He has laid out for us.

With all of these things going on in my life, I am completely overwhelmed. God does not want us to become comfortable but to constantly be challenged because as long as we are challenged, we are growing.  I am so thankful God has let me find this place where I am challenged and insanely happy at the same time.

Overflowing...

The past two months have been so busy and I thought after October my life would slow down a little but it seems to be picking up speed.  Between work, my photography, friends and family, I have been very sleep deprived but happy!  It's funny how you think you have far too much on your plate but somehow find time for more...

On that same subject, I have a new boyfriend. He is amazing. I really can not describe how this all happened. All I know is he is a gift from God. I have asked for a man that accepts me just as I am. One who tells me I am beautiful and looks me in the eye and I know he is telling me the truth. I have asked for a man who is open and honest and likes affection. A giver and a taker. I have only been seeing Dustin for around 2 weeks but thus far, he is all of these things and more. His passion for the Lord is overflowing which inspires and motivates me to reach higher. I had become lax in my motivation for reading my bible and praying and not only because of him but because I want to know for certain this is right, I have been praying and looking to God for guidance in a way I haven't in a LONG time. 

I feel God's hand on this and I can feel Him working in my life.  It has all happened so fast and all at once. I am starting back to nursing school in Jan. Dustin has swept me off my feet. I have an amazing group of friends I can whole heartedly say I would do anything for and trust that they would do the same for me. I have FINALLY started to lose some more weight.My sister has a new, great job and our relationship is growing again. 

So is it wrong that I am waiting for the ceiling to fall in? Last year was so hard. So much loss in our family and so much loss in my life. I feel like I am afraid to move sometimes in fear that something might shift just enough to make everything crumble.  It reminds me of when I was little and I would hear my mom yell at me to do something but I would sit as still and quietly as I could, hoping she would simply forget about what she had just yelled and move on to someone else. I feel like if I stay quiet and don't move too much, things will stay happy.

I am just trying not to dwell in that fear and enjoy what I have in front of me. I am trying to build my life in Christ and know that He is my strong foundation and if I am still and quiet and continue to follow the path He has laid out before me, I will be ok and someday that fear will disappear and I will accept that God has given me this amazing life to live in happiness and I no longer have to fear the storm.

CRAZY!!

Things have been super busy lately! Last weekend, Chicago was awesome! Had so much fun visiting Megan and hanging out with Michelle and Alex.  We went out and got a little crazy:)

This weekend is no less busy! Tonight, I am babysitting the Russian babies. Tomorrow, I am running my first 5K EVER! I am nervous but only because I went on a 2.3 mile walk/run yesterday and now my left hip is really sore. Hopefully, I'll work through it today and feel all better for tomorrow. Then, tomorrow after the 5K, I am going to lunch with Katie, Mollie, and Kaiti.  After that, I am supposed to be going to Mark and Carolyn's, who I will be housesitting for starting on Sunday, to get a run down of the furry children routine! Church is after that, and then I am heading out with my sister to Wentzville to her friend's house for an Octoberfest celebration!

BUSIEST SATURDAY EVER!!

In love with life...

So I have been really bad about this posting frequently thing. I am going to try to make more of an effort. Mostly because I feel that its a way for me to express myself in a way sometimes I feel I lack.

Look how cute Jenny is!

The whole group getting ready to go zip-lining!

Meg & Michelle!

Haley, the Rockstar!

Our Campsite

 October has been CRAZY busy! I love every second of it though. I am going to be VERY broke by the end of the month but I am really enjoying myself! Last weekend, my small group, B. I. T. E., went camping and zip-lining. It was so much fun!! Our group is growing in numbers and in our faith.  I can feel the Holy Spirit working in and through us. We have started meeting in my parents' house and everyone seems to enjoy it here. To check out what we are discussing and doing, go check out our blog *HERE*.

This weekend I am going to Chicago for Megan's birthday!  Michelle, Alex, and I will be driving up on Thursday and coming back on Saturday. Hopefully, I will get a bunch of awesome pictures and will post them on Sunday.  Please pray for a safe (and fun!) trip.

Also, please pray for those who have lost loved ones recently. My friends have lost so many people close to them recently.

Katie & Mollie have lost their 20 year old cousin, Josh Passiglia, to a car accident which also killed a mother of three.

Chris lost his friend to a skydiving accident.

Megan's friend from high school passed away in a motorcycle accident.

Ryan's 5 year old cousin was hit by a car and killed.

So much young life has been lost recently. Please keep all of their families and friends in your prayers.  Death is hard enough to deal with at a ripe old age, but it is even more tragic when someone who hasn't yet experience all of life's joy is taken prematurely.

Thanks, 

Meg...

OH and one more pic!

Put this picture up to show off embarrass my new friend, Dustin. Doesn't he look like a model?? ;)